Showing posts with label Swell Stuff. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Swell Stuff. Show all posts

MST3K's Nicknames for Space Mutiny's Dave Ryder

>> Thursday, December 10, 2015



Herewith, a list of all the nicknames Mike and the Bots give the character Dave Ryder in the stink-a-rific cheesy movie SPACE MUTINY:

Beat Punchbeef
Big McLargehuge
Blast Hardcheese
Blast Thickneck
Bold Bigflank
Bolt Vanderhuge
Brick Hardmeat
Buck Plankchest
Buff Drinklots
Buff Hardback
Butch Deadlift
Crud BoneMeal
Crunch Buttsteak
Dirk Hardpec
Fist Rockbone
Flint Ironstag
Fridge Largemeat
Gristle McThornbody
Hack Blowfist
Lump Beefbroth
Punch Rockgroin
Punch Sideiron
Punt Speedchunk
Reef Blastbody
Roll Fizzlebeef
Rip Steakface
Slab Bulkhead
Slab Squatthrust
Slate Fistcrunch
Slate Slabrock
Smash Lampjaw
Smoke Manmuscle
Splint Chesthair
Stump Beefknob
Stump Chunkman
Thick McRunfast
Touch Rustrod
Trunk Slamchest
Whip Slagcheek
and Bob Johnson.

Wait.

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More Canterbury Tales

>> Sunday, February 22, 2015


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More Canterbury Tales

>> Sunday, February 15, 2015


Just for you, Tanita!

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More Canterbury Tales

>> Saturday, February 7, 2015

Found these while clearing out some old files in the cabinet. Back in the mid-90s, I briefly had the fun idea to take medieval drawings and put funny captions on them. I give you, MORE CANTERBURY TALES by Meister Gratz:






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The Barbie TARDIS

>> Sunday, August 4, 2013


Meet the Barbie TARDIS!


I built this for my daughter Jo, who is eleven years old and super into Doctor Who. (As she should be.) She has dressed up one of her dolls in a Who-esque costume, and calls her the Lady Doctor. I couldn't let the Lady Doctor travel without a TARDIS of her own!


The TARDIS is made out of scrap plywood of different widths I had lying around from previous projects. The windows are a thick frosted plastic, with the casement lines drawn on with a Sharpie. They let in a soft light, which I like, and Jo likes putting electric tea candles inside and letting the windows glow from within. With both doors open, you can see inside where I glued the windows in.


The "POLICE BOX" signs at the top were found online (thanks, Who-builders!) and glued on with Spray-Mount. The blue paint was chosen by Wendi and Jo on one of their trips to Asheville--I think they nailed the TARDIS blue!


The sign on the telephone door was printed out from a larger image I found on the web. In this picture, you can also see the teeny-tiny handles I bought from woodvictoriandollhouse.com. They came in brass, so I spray-painted them black. The handles, the paint, and the hardware for the light on top were the only things I had to buy for the project.

I should also point out that though I like to call this "The Barbie TARDIS," that doll is not a Barbie. She is, in fact, a Monster High doll, which Jo much prefers. This is the Robecca Steam doll, who is steampunk-themed. The clothes, however, are homemade--they are pieces from the Project Barbie challenge Wendi and I did together years ago, when we made Barbie clothes to match the challenges on a season of Project Runway. Jo likes the colors because she feels they are very Doctor Who.


While I was building the TARDIS (which took MONTHS, much to Jo's chagrin) I saw this little K-9 advertised on ThinkGeek, and I had to get it for her!


And look--the scale is perfect! I surprised her with it (and the finished TARDIS) when she got back from sleepaway camp last month. The TARDIS itself is pretty large--about 16.5 inches tall and 8.5 inches wide. Jo likes it because her Lady Doctor can fit a lot of companions in there with her, including K-9.


I'm really pleased with the look of the signage, and the slightly mottled look the plywood took on when I painted it. It looks like a weathered and used TARDIS.


I decided to add the St. John Ambulance logo, which is on the 11th Doctor's TARDIS. Here again you can see one of the super-tiny handles.


I struggled with how to do the light at the top. I trolled the dollhouse aisles at our local hobby shops and surfed around online looking for a sort of hurricane lamp I could appropriate for a light on top, but never found anything. Then I had the idea to use a test tube--and we just so happened to have a tiny one already, which was being used to hold beads! The test tube is inserted upside-down through the three layers at the top, and held in place with a swinging hatch made out of the window plastic, so I can replace the little light bulb if and when it blows out. The light bulb was bought at a hobby shop--it's meant to light streetlamps and homes on a model train layout.


The light is strung to a 9-volt battery on the inside, and then to a little switch I acquired at Radio Shack. Because who doesn't love flipping switches!? The light switch sticks out the back corner of the TARDIS, and is pretty unobtrusive. I had dreamed of attaching a sound chip to it with the sound of the TARDIS taking off and landing, but alas, that's beyond my very limited technical abilities. As it is, the TARDIS goes "WERRRN-WERRRN-WERRRN" only when you flip the switch and say "WERRRN-WERRRN-WERRRN" at the same time.


Here's a pic of one of the unpainted panels. I used a coping saw to do the windows, and ended up using a chisel to hack out the top layer of plywood to create the panels. When my chiseling got rough, I smoothed it with wood putty, as you can see in that top right panel, then sanded it flat.


The Barbie TARDIS, exploded view, during the painting phase.


I'm thrilled with the result, and so is Jo! Allons-y, Lady Doctor!

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Nancy Drew in The Tomb of the Cybermen

>> Thursday, February 14, 2013


I made this.  From an idea by my friend Wes Stitt. Kind of a hack job on GIMP, the Linux freeware Photoshop, but I'm pretty proud of it. The number in the corner is the year the original Doctor Who serial The Tomb of the Cybermen debuted.

That's a mash-up I'd love to read!

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Awesome Minimalist Lego Posters

>> Friday, March 23, 2012

Can you name the TV characters represented in these terrific, minimalist Lego ads?





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Super Mario Bros. Jitterbug

>> Thursday, August 11, 2011



Too awesome for words.

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Check out my new R2-D2 beanie!

>> Thursday, May 19, 2011


Check out this awesome R2-D2 beanie Wendi made for me! I love it so much I've been wearing it around the house even when there's no one here to see it.


It's far too time-intensive for her to sell them affordably, but Wendi is selling the pattern as an add-on to her basic beanie pattern. To learn more, click here to go to her craft blog, Shiny Happy World!

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Happy Birthday, William Shatner

>> Tuesday, March 22, 2011



Happy 80th (!) Bill Shatner. Stay awesome.

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Manufactured by Gratz Industries

>> Thursday, January 6, 2011


We knew there was a foundry on Long Island called Gratz Industries, but we didn't know they were famous for making Pilates equipment* until our friend Sarah Mlynowski snapped this pic with her camera phone. Awesome! We applaud industrious Gratzes of all ilks.

*And is it me, or do Pilates machines look like torture devices!?

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Is Ferris Bueller the Cat in the Hat?

>> Wednesday, January 5, 2011


Wendi and I watched Easy A last night, which was fun, and has lots of great 80s teen movie references, including quite a few Ferris Bueller refs. That prompted us to pull out Ferris Bueller's Day Off and watch it as a sort of teen-movie, multi-generational double-feature, and we had fun all over again. ("Ladies and gentlemen, we'd like to play a little tune for you. I dedicate it to a man who doesn't think he's seen anything good today. Cameron Frye, this one's for you...")

The odd thing about rewatching Ferris Bueller for perhaps the thousandth time (a conservative estimate) is that this time, I saw it as Cameron's story, not Ferris'. Ferris is the fun one. He's the one for whom everything always works out. But most of us aren't Ferris Bueller, no matter how much we want to be. We're more like Cameron Frye. We're nervous, we're scared, we're tentative about life. And it's Cameron who changes by the end of the movie, not Ferris. Cameron's the character who grows and changes. We love Ferris for not growing and changing, much as we love Peter Pan for the same reasons, but none of can ever really be Peter Pan, either.

In fact, as I watched the film, I couldn't help comparing Ferris to another character who shows up in some nervous and tentative characters' lives and mixes things up for one crazy day:
The Cat in the Hat, who promised two children they would have some "fun that is funny." I can't think of a better way to describe Ferris and his day off. Of course, when the Cat in the Hat leaves, everything is put back exactly the way it was when he arrived, and in Ferris Bueller's Day Off...well, if you've seen it, you know what isn't exactly the same as it was in the beginning of the movie. (I can't believe I'm even being careful about spoilers here. Seriously, if you haven't seen this movie, go out and rent it RIGHT NOW.)

So, is Ferris Bueller the Cat in the Hat? Discuss amongst yourselves...

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Tron's Legacy?

>> Tuesday, December 14, 2010


There's an awful lot of buzz out there right now about the new Tron: Legacy movie, a long-awaited follow-up to the cult classic from 1982. But good luck finding the original Tron on DVD to watch ahead of the new holiday blockbuster. The DVD is out of print, and the only remaining copies available on Amazon are going for around $120. Same thing on eBay. According to the L.A. Times:

Netflix lists "Tron" as "availability unknown," only two of Blockbuster's 30 L.A.-area stores had copies in stock this week, iTunes doesn't offer the title and even specialty stores that pride themselves on stocking obscure used DVDs are empty-handed.
Why, you might ask, wouldn't Disney capitalize on all the hype for the new movie to sell copies of the old one? It seems like an incredibly stupid move not to have at least the old version--let alone the planned newly remastered version available for sale and rental in the weeks leading up to the premiere of the new movie.

The L.A. Times speculates that Disney doesn't want the now antiquated special effects of the original to turn off modern audiences:

"Tron" was a much more modest success than those films, however, earning $33 million at the box office and becoming a cult favorite for its groundbreaking use of computer-generated effects and a prescient story about computer culture. Today its effects might look quaint to sophisticated audiences.

Disney says it will release Lisberger's remaster of "Tron" sometime in 2011. It's possible the company is deliberately holding back on printing new copies of a movie that could alienate the broad, non-geek audiences they'll need to make "Tron: Legacy" a success.

"That film was ahead of its time," says Jan Saxton, an analyst at Adams Media Research. "But they want the focus to be on their new effort."

Stupid. Just really stupid, IMHO. Way to miss out on sales there, Disney! Because I can't tell the difference between the special effects in movies made in 1982 and one made in 2010...

I'm just glad I have that Tron special edition DVD Paul gave me for Christmas a while back! Who knew it would become a collector's item too?

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Life advice (?) from a Japanese toy box

>> Thursday, November 18, 2010


I've been saving this box from a little toy I bought at a Tokyo Swallows baseball game during my visit to Japan in the spring for a little while now, because I've been meaning to blog it. The toy was just a little plastic brick guy in a baseball uniform, but the box turned out to be something special. All along the top there (half-hidden by a sticker) and along the sides are...advice? Life lessons? Philosophical musings? Social commentary? I'm not quite sure. Whatever it is, the author certainly has a lot to say on the matter.

I present the text here in the hopes that you, dear readers, can discern some truth or meaning from them. From the front of the box:

Everyone is playing himself or herself, in spite of he or she is conscious it or not. People cannot stop the play because their ideas are strongly affected by international information that is brought by TV and Newspapers, and they are conscious themselves by social bonds, although they may believe that they are making decisions by themselves first, then they take actions, but these are strongly affected.

The daily life that does not have any changes is passing with unexpected fine balances.

Everything that people is feeling by their five senses is in their inside. They cannot show them to other people as they are.

And from the side:

The imperfection is becoming a motivation to cope with social environment. However suppose people could love others only to the level that they can compromise. You should take more interested in yourself. What really am I?

What really am I indeed? A toy box that has given us a lot to think about for sure.

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Harry Potter sings Tom Lehrer's "The Elements"

>> Wednesday, November 17, 2010


Yet another reason to love Daniel Radcliffe...

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WTF?

>> Monday, November 15, 2010


In honor of Jo's favorite new expression (and when I find the person who taught it to her, I'm not going to let him be her dad anymore!) here's a funny as hell collection of prints where the only thing the people can really say is...WTF?

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The most zen Star Wars homage you'll ever watch

>> Wednesday, November 10, 2010


Check out this mesmerizing three-minute, cut paper version of the original three Star Wars movies by Eric Power to the song "Tatooine" by Jeremy Messersmith! Eric's got plenty more beautiful paper cut pop art films up on YouTube as well...

(Via WWdN: In Exile, via Geekosystem)

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Mad Men Mr. Men

>> Tuesday, October 26, 2010

Made of awesome. Thanks to Bookshelves of Doom for the link.

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Ellery Queen series makes it to DVD


Anybody remember the Ellery Queen TV series? It only ran for one season--1975-1976--which is astounding because it was so much fun. I watched these in reruns at some point, but I still haven't seen them in years. Now they're finally available on DVD! 

Ellery Queen was a lot of fun. Developed by Levinson and Link, the minds behind Columbo and, later, Murder, She Wrote, the episodes followed amateur detective Ellery Queen of short story fame as he stepped in to help his father, Detective Queen, solve the oddest of odd mysteries. The series broke the fourth wall by setting the scene in narration, having murder victims sit and talk to the camera, and then allowing Ellery, when everything had been laid out, to turn to the audience and say, "Have you figured it out yet? You've got all the clues you need!" The murders are clean and cozy too, making this one to share with the whole family.

Ellery Queen also stars a host of great actors from back in the day. In addition to regulars Jim Hutton (father of Timothy Hutton, who would go on to play a TV detective himself: Archie Goodwin!) and David Wayne, who plays his father, the series features Tony Hillerman as a recurring radio detective character, George Burns, Eve Arden, Rudy Vallee, Ray Milland, Don Ameche, Ida Lupino, Vincent Price, Mel Ferrer, Kim Hunter, Joan Collins, Ray Walston, Tom Bosley, Betty White, Robbert Loggia, Rene Auberjonois, Jim Backus, Larry Hagman, June Lockhart, John Larroquette, Eva Gabor, Dean Stockwell, Tab Hunter, Roddy McDowall, Ed McMahon, Dick Van Patten, Tricia O'Neil, Cesar Romero, Dick Sargent, Diana Muldaur, Noah Beery Jr., Troy Donahue, Dr. Joyce Brothers, Victor Buono, and Eddie Albert--just to name a few

Why did this show ever get canceled?* Sheesh. Ah well, to the Netflix queue!

 
* Well, this might have something to do with it: according to Wikipedia, Jim Hutton died four years later in 1979 from liver cancer. What a loss.

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Next Saturday night, we're sending you back to the future!

>> Wednesday, October 20, 2010


AMC theaters are celebrating the 25th anniversary of Back to the Future with two days of shows around the country. The nearest show for us looks like Charlotte, which is two and a half hours away, or else I'd take Jo to see it on the big screen. Here's the list of cities and theaters, in case yours is on there.

There's that word again; "heavy". Why are things so heavy in the future? Is there a problem with the earth's gravitational pull?

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