Pity poor Starman

>> Sunday, January 22, 2006

Pity poor Starman, Golden Age superhero and father of the ultra-hip modern hero who inherited his astronomical mantle. DC comics put out a fantasticly sculpted set of action figures, but they were apparently never intended to be taken out of their boxes.

What did I do to snap Ted Knight's shoulder out of its socket? Just how did I ruin this great hero's noble career?

I tried to raise his arm so that it pointed toward the stars.

That's right - all I did was swivel the arm in its socket, and - POP! - off it came.

I'm so sick of this. I'm sick of action figures that take ten minutes to extract from their packaging because they've been posed in some crazy position. I'm sick of action figures who won't stand up on their own two legs, either because the legs are so spindly the figure topples over, or the legs are sculpted in some ridiculously unstable pose. I'm sick of figures with slightly variant paint jobs, of figures that talk or light up or speak. With rare exception, modern action figures make terrible toys.

Starman included.

3 comments:

Fabricationist,  January 23, 2006 at 11:08 PM  

It should POP right back in. Otherwise return it to where you got it and get a new one. Tell them it was broken when you opened the package. From now on have him lay on his back, pointing to the stars, like the rest of us have to do.

Alan January 24, 2006 at 1:38 AM  

Can't pop it back in - this is the arm with the stupid wires leading to the painful-looking metal tracks in his hand that are supposed to light up his hand-held cosmic rod. (Please, no snickering.)

The arm socket isn't constructed like those old Marvel action figures you could dismember and miraculously regenerate. Instead there is the distinctive mark of broken plastic, and the telling rattle of the loose connector inside.

This was a gift - and Cthulu knows who still carries this figure - so it looks like a little glue will have to do the trick. The arm that holds his cosmic rod will just have to be stiff. (I said stop that snickering!)

Fabricationist,  January 25, 2006 at 6:29 PM  

Well, at least you can now glue it in the position of your choice. (snicker, snicker)

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